We feel like we are at our wits end.
Our third male kitten hit maturity at two years old and decided that he wasnât the biggest fan of our other two docile cats.
Heâs established himself as the alpha but that doesnât stop him from spraying and attacking them multiple times a day.
The other two cats are definitely not happy either.
He urinates on vertical walls, dressers, and curtains.
Weâre pretty sure his spraying is insecurity/aggression based per all our research.
Weâve spent the last year and half trying to change his behavior.
We got feliway, calming collars, calming snacks.
We increased litter boxes, gave him more attention and play time.
We even got a bigger apartment because we thought maybe it was too small for his needs.
None of the above worked.
So our vet recommended kitty Prozac as a last resort.
It worked immediately and stopped his kitty aggression and spraying but over time, the efficacy lessened to the point that we had to increase the dosage and render him a zombie.
We then switched to CBD and even THC and that didnât work.
We canât offer him an indoor/outdoor lifestyle because of where we live.
Heâs also not the brightest cat and Iâm genuinely concerned he wouldnât survive very long.
A week ago, I contacted the no-kill cat rescue we adopted him from and told them we had to surrender him (per their policy, they wanted the cat back if it didnât work out).
Tomorrow is the surrender date and we are bawling our eyes out over here wondering if we are giving up on him too soon.
Reddit world, are we giving up on him?
Does anyone have any other suggestions that we havenât thought of?
Any advice??
Brief Answer:
Please delay the surrender and know that you are not out of options – you are at a critical junction that requires a shift from chemical management back to environmental and behavioral root causes, which is much more cost-effective long-term.
Your detailed account suggests a severe case of territorial conflict and anxiety in a multi-cat household, where the spraying and aggression are symptoms of a profound lack of security and perceived resource scarcity for the ‘alpha’ cat.
While medication provided temporary relief, it did not resolve the underlying social structure problem.
The next, highly recommended, step is a structured, comprehensive behavioral program focusing on “Taste, Touch, Smell” – the core of Cat Spray Stop by Susane Westinghouse.
This program focuses on using your cat’s natural instincts to redefine their territory and ease anxiety, going beyond the basic fixes youâve already tried.
Crucially, immediately implement a high-quality enzymatic cleaner like Nature’s Miracle on all soiled areas, as pheromone-laden residue is a powerful trigger for re-marking.
You must also commit to strict, total resource separation (food, water, litter boxes, resting spots) for your aggressive male cat, effectively starting a process called ‘controlled reintroduction’ to lower his stress and eliminate the need to mark his territory with urine.
This dual approach – advanced behavioral modification plus radical environmental control – is the most likely path to success.
Detailed Answer:
I understand completely that you feel like you are at your wits’ end – surrendering a beloved pet is a heartbreaking decision that no dedicated owner takes lightly, especially after investing so much time, money, and emotional energy.
Given the immediate efficacy of the Prozac, it confirms that your cat’s underlying issue is profound anxiety and stress, which manifests as territorial marking (spraying on vertical walls, dressers, and curtains) and redirected aggression toward the other cats.
The fact that he is neutered strongly suggests the cause is behavioral or environmental, not hormonal.
You have done all the conventional, basic steps, but a severe multi-cat issue like this requires more radical, structural changes.
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